American Idol Contestant, Scotty McCreery, is, actually, Alfred E. Neuman

I was watching American Idol last night and realized why Scotty McCreery, American Idol contestant, looks so familiar to me. He's been gracing the cover of Mad Magazine for the last 50 years or so. Yes. It's true. Scotty McCreery is, actually, Alfred E. Neuman and I have proof.

Just take a look at the photo of Scotty to the right. Next to Scotty is an image of Alfred E. Neuman for comparison. Scotty's uncanny resemblance to Alfred E. Neuman is not really uncanny at all because they're the same man, Alfred E. Neuman. Photos don't lie.

You see, Alfred E. Neuman needs to make a career switch. The Internet has killed print media and Alfred is no longer the star he once was. So, he took some singing lessons, made up a fake name, and tried out for American Idol. It's looking mighty promising for Alfred now. America loves him. But, America doesn't know that Alfred and Scotty are the same person - that is, until now. I've, single-handedly, uncovered Scotty's, I mean Alfred's, secret plan and feel that the world needs to know.

More Proof

I scanned the cover of a recent issue of Mad Magazine. Does the guy on the center of the cover look familar? Why yes, of course, he does. He looks like Scotty McCreery. Well, folks, that's not Scotty. That's Alfred E. Neuman. Case closed. The truth is in the pictures, people.

Of course, I wouldn't stab somebody in the back. So, I approached Scotty, I mean Alfred, and showed him the pictures and let him know that I planned to post his secret identity on my web site. This was his reaction...

Like I said earlier, proof is in the pictures, people.

Who is Pia Toscano, really?

I'm also a little suspicious of that Pia Toscano chick - also an American Idol contestant. Don't let her sweet and innocent good looks fool you. She's got America believing that she's Pia from Long Island. Yeah, right. Like I believe that. I've been suspicious of Pia's story and intentions since the beginning of the 2011 American Idol season. I think that Pia is fibbing about her identity in an attempt to make a career move - just like Alfred E. Neuman is fibbing about being Scotty McCreery. I think that I know who Pia really is.

I found this photo of Pia and made Pia's skin green...

Look familar? Pia looks a lot like She-Hulk. Now, She-Hulk is capable of turning herself back into a regular everyday human at will. So, that would explain Pia's ability to not appear green on American Idol.

Again, the Internet has killed the print media industry and comic books are classified as print media. That's why I've made the connection. She-Hulk also needs to make a career change. So, She-Hulk is masquerading around on television pretending to be the sweet and innocent Pia from Long Island.

Now, take a look at this recent cover of She-Hulk,,,

She-Hulk looks a heckuva lot like a green Pia Toscano. I think that's pretty solid evidence that Pia is not really Pia. Pia is actually She-Hulk.

I forewarned Pia, I mean She-Hulk, of my intentions just as I did to Scotty, I mean Alfred, and this was her reaction...

Again, the proof is in the pictures, people.

Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with Alfred E. Neuman or She-Hulk wanting to make career changes. And, they're certainly free to be contestants on American Idol. After all, they both have awesome singing abilities. But, it's the lies and deception that I don't approve of and I thought the world should know who Scotty and Pia really are.

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